Forum Game: The stockings were hung by the [chimney] with [care].

[Pengy]

The Beer-belly Avenger Report:
Yes ladies and gentlemen, I am not binding blubber.

[Paragon Avenger]

The costumed Avenger Report:
Yes ladies and gentlemen, I am not concealed carry.

[Paragon Avenger]

The Drumline Avenger Report:
Yes ladies and gentlemen, I am not doing drugs.

[Paragon Avenger]

The Early Avenger Report:
Yes ladies and gentlemen, I am not eating.

[Pengy]

The Fabulous Avenger Report:
Yes ladies and gentlemen, I am not finding fish.

[Paragon Avenger]

The Golden Avenger Report:
Yes ladies and gentlemen, I am not glitter.

[Pengy]

The Herbivorous Avenger Report:
Yes ladies and gentlemen, I am not having hamburger.

[Paragon Avenger]

The Idiotic Avenger Report:
Yes ladies and gentlemen, I am not intelligent.

(I wonder why they saved the letter 'I' for me?)

[Paragon Avenger]

The Justice Avenger Report:
Yes ladies and gentlemen, I am not judgmental.

[healix]

The Kings Row Report:
Yes ladies and gentlemen, I am not kissable.

[Pengy]

The Library Avenger Report:
Yes ladies and gentlemen, I am not loud.

[crashpositron]

The Meatless Avenger Report:
Yes, ladies and gentlemen, I am not masticating mammals.

[Paragon Avenger]

The Nerd Avenger Report:
Yes, ladies and gentlemen, I am not Neanderthal.

[Pengy]

The Obstinate Avenger Report:
Yes, ladies and gentlemen, I am not obeisant.

[Paragon Avenger]

The Pantless Avenger Report:
Yes, ladies and gentlemen, I am not wearing pants.

[Pengy]

The Quack Avenger Report:
Yes, ladies and gentlemen, I am not qualified to practice medicine.

[Paragon Avenger]

The Restless Avenger Report:
Yes, ladies and gentlemen, I am not resting until justice is served.

[Pengy]

The Space Avenger Report:
Yes, ladies and gentlemen, I am not sauntering at sub-light speed.

[Paragon Avenger]

The Topless Avenger Report:
Yes, ladies and gentlemen, I am not wearing a taupee.

[Paragon Avenger]

The undressed Avenger Report:
Yes, ladies and gentlemen, I am not wearing a dress.