Hey all, I've said this before, but I'm going to say it again because, as corny as it sounds, I do care about you folks and it's really important.
If you're having a lot of trouble coming to grips with the game shutting down, please seek professional help. Don't feel silly, and don't let anyone convince you that "it's just a game" is a valid reason not to feel a sense of loss or a reason to grieve. There are too many people out there who don't understand just how immersing an experience playing these games can be, and the kind of social ties that are suddenly yanked away when an event like this happens.
There are a lot of resources on the web to help out in seeking help. Here's an article on WebMD, for example, that might help. Google is your friend.
Mental health is no less important than physical health. I've mentioned this before too, and it's no less true now. If you break your arm, it's stupid to just hope it heals right on its own. Hopefully you'd recognize anyone whose advice is to just suck it up and get over it as either not having your best interest at heart or grossly misunderstanding the necessity of medical attention. Your brain is MUCH more important than your arm in living a healthy, happy life. PLEASE take care of it just like you would any other organ or body part that is having some trouble!
Dear TonyV, First, Thank you, man! You are so totally awesome with what all you've done here on Titan Network and how you/Titan basically "saved" the CoH Community from being totally homeless; i.e. we can be here even tho we lost (i believe only temporarily) our venue (the mmo.)
I'm gonna post a few links from a related grieving thread because I think some posts there speak directly to this topic. Besides, it'll lend weight to my observations.
CoH meant a great deal to almost all of us. The experience of playing CoH meant more to a number of us than we ever imagined it did, until it was gone. (I know that was true for me. I was freakin' shocked to discover I could care this much about CoH or anything categorized as "a game".) Playing CoH served multiple purposes from hanging out with friends (I remember some nights logging in to find people simply using coh as a chat room, which IMO was just fine, especially since most of the late night global chat was about builds, etc. tho sometimes it was just to IM chat for those of us who have occasional insomnia) to simply playing the game for the inherent pleasure of playing. I know I used CoH at times as a stress-reliever to "blow off steam" from whatever RL niggling frustrations were getting to me (old norse Nugla) and LOL even had friends suggest to me on occasion that I go "blow up pixels" aka play CoH for a while. I also played CoH as a pain-reliever, since the distraction provided by the immersive virtual world was better for me than a movie in pain-management. In the
Star Trek: TNG sense, CoH was my holodeck.
Unlike many adults and teens, since I am retired I have the luxury of time. Many don't; and I well recall having to deal with my grieving the loss of a family member on a piecemeal basis when I was a working adult. I believe this speaks directly to why our fellow fans and players of CoH are still expressing here on Titan feelings of sorrow and/or anger about CoH no longer 'being there" for us. Again, kudos to Titan Network forums for giving us all a safe place to ventilate such feelings. I'd like to quote our friend and fellow CoH player, Alchemedic, "Second, this community is providing people what is the most important thing necessary for the grieving process, which is support and understanding. The stresses people will feel about this is likely outside this forum. If places like this did not exist for people to express their sorrow, then it would be awful; the people here are helping each other by giving each other the time and space to mourn "openly." source:
http://www.cohtitan.com/forum/index.php/topic,6503.msg84803.html#msg84803 Alchemedic, who said he was a former professional bereavement counselor, and others had other things to say in that related thread; e.g.
http://www.cohtitan.com/forum/index.php/topic,6503.msg83185.html#msg83185 and
http://www.cohtitan.com/forum/index.php/topic,6503.msg80923.html#msg80923My own view is to grieve and let it out. I know I don't wanna be saddled with either toxic anger, sorrow, or other unaddressed issues. Again, I was just totally blown away, initially, by the strength of my emotional response to CoH ending. But, having lived a bit above 5 decades on the planet, knew what I was feeling and able to identify my emotions. Heck, I even had to deal with feelings of shock and surprise that I even had such feelings, but once I recognized the emotions there was no way I was
not gonna deal with them. Thus unlike some younger adults and definitely teens I had decades of experience to draw upon to help me get thru this. This late in my own process I still feel occasional twinges of sorrow and anger - heck, as I write this I'm ANGRY at NCSoft and I guess even more broadly the world that the pleasure of playing CoH is denied me. Though, yeah, life does go on. *picks up metaphorical broom to start sweeping* and/or *picks up large and even small pieces of a beloved broken vase to see how I might glue it back together* Long story short here: People need to grieve here for as long as we do, no time limit. Especially and perhaps particularly those working adults and teens who are going thru their grieving process piecemeal and/or for whom this is the first significant loss they've had in their young lives.
I don't want to take anything away from what you're saying, TonyV. I've benefited twice from working thru my emotions with a bereavement counselor. (If any want details, I am willing to share that via PM or email but no casual reader need be burdened seeing me write about how I personally coped with such losses here.)
I'd like to conclude with a couple of Light Bulb jokes. They go like this:
How many Minnesotans does it take to change a light bulb? Answer: Two. One to change it and the other to jump-start it. (We often in MPLS, MN help one another jump start each other's cars during Minnesota winters (think Frostbite Falls from
Rocky & Bullwinkle)
How many Manhattenites (people from Manhatten Island) does it take to change a light bulb? Answer: Two. One to mix the martinis while the other phones the electrician.
How many Zen Buddhists does it take to change a light bulb? Answer: The orchid has many petals. (I invite you to think about this
koan a moment)
Thank you, Titans, and Peace Out. I hope you have a beautiful day! and a restful, relaxing evening.