Pick a company that really has no business in online gaming and using their ad campaign make a case for their buying City of Heroes.
NCSoft
What is SABOTAGE?
Sabotage is a new battleground match-type...
Oh SNAP! :gonk:
Campbell's Soup
CoH would be mm' mm' good.
Heinz Ketchup
Anticipation...
The taste thats worth the wait.
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=uoLoyg3JKRQ (https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=uoLoyg3JKRQ)
Progressive Insurance
You get / have to team with Flo.
Honda
Budweiser
Kellogg
City of Heroes - They're GrrrrrrrrRRRRRRREAT!
i agree with Campbells Tsooup actually....
Quote from: MegaWatt on November 16, 2014, 06:34:08 PM
i agree with Campbells Tsooup actually....
FedEx and Exlax can joing forces to buy the game so they can get this S**T Moving.
maybe we need to send the ceo on coh some of these and some wood glue.
http://images.amazon.com/images/G/01/toys/detail-page/c26-B004S6EHFQ-2-l.jpg
Quote from: duane on November 16, 2014, 06:44:53 PM
FedEx and Exlax can joing forces to buy the game so they can buy the game and get this S**T Moving.
Hahahahahaha!
....
Hahahahahaha!
Papa John's:
Better Mechanics. Better Play.
Nestlé.
They'd fit right in with City of Villains! :p
Jack Daniels, gameplay will be filtered through sugar maple charcoal. To add more smoothness to the game.
Maxwell House
"City of Heroes: Good to the last villain dropped."
Quote from: johng736@gmail.com on November 16, 2014, 07:09:02 AM
Progressive Insurance
You get / have to team with Flo.
Is she an aggro queen?
Little Caesars pizza
DARK DARK !
State Farm. Like a good Neighbor, Statesfarm is there.
General Mills -- who will come out with City of Her-O's.
Featuring flavor O's like...
Sister Strawberry
Positron Purple (grape)
War Witch Watermellon
and many more...
Jack Daniels
Cheetos
Baddies that go crunch.
Quote from: Sinistar on November 18, 2014, 11:05:44 PM
Jack Daniels
I already said J.D.
First page about the 15th entry.
"Filtered for extra smooth gameplay"
American Family Insurance
Sung to tune of jiggle: American Family Villains
Just My Size
The game just fits.
Dos Equis beer
The most interesting man in the world: "I don't always play MMOs, but when I do, I prefer City of Heroes."
The commercial ends with him stating the signature sign-off: "Stay the course, my friends."
Chef Gordon Ramsay:
"Where the f&%k is the f&%king game? Why the f&%k isn't the f&%king game up and f&%king running yet? Just buy the f&%king game and put it the f&%k online! The f&%king customers are f&%king waiting!"
Quote from: Ryo Kinsaru on November 21, 2014, 01:40:00 AM
Chef Gordon Ramsay:
"Where the f&%k is the f&%king game? Why the f&%k isn't the f&%king game up and f&%king running yet? Just buy the f&%king game and put it the f&%k online! The f&%king customers are f&%king waiting!"
Love it.
Quote from: Ryo Kinsaru on November 21, 2014, 01:40:00 AM
Chef Gordon Ramsay:
"Where the f&%k is the f&%king game? Why the f&%k isn't the f&%king game up and f&%king running yet? Just buy the f&%king game and put it the f&%k online! The f&%king customers are f&%king waiting!"
F&%king awesome.
The UFC - Dana White speaking to NCSoft.
So you wanna be a fsking MMO company? Then you better get the game online and stop fsking jerking my chain. Look you are the ones stupid enough to shutdown the fsking game. Stop being a moron and sign the fsking papers. Get on with it or I'll have Ronda Rousey stop by and break your fsking arm.
Verizon Wireless
They could over charge us for the game.
Eight cents a minute of gameplay, unless you buy a package.
Now if you exceed your package minutes than there is an overage fee plus the charge for the minutes.
And task forces and incarnate trials are extra.
Unless you buy the All In The Family plan that includes 2 additional accounts, $59.95 for each additional account. And more confusing plans and options.
And nighttime and weekends are free, but not in all areas.
Visa Infinite.
Paragon City: It's everywhere you want to be.
The Home Depot
"More Saving. More Doing."
CoH (I) = City of Home Improvement.
Malaysia Airlines
We bring heaven to earth.
Toha Heavy Industries.
Lays Potato Chips
No one can play just one mission.
Lil' Debbie snack cakes
You know you want to play.
Quote from: johng736@gmail.com on November 16, 2014, 07:09:02 AM
Progressive Insurance
You get / have to team with Flo.
Geico
15 Task Forces with Johng can earn you 15 million in debt XP.
;D
Quote from: johng736@gmail.com on November 16, 2014, 07:09:02 AM
Progressive Insurance
You get / have to team with Flo.
Quote from: Floride on November 27, 2014, 04:54:52 AM
Geico
15 Task Forces with Johng can earn you 15 million in debt XP.
;D
Flo, is that you, with the hair and the name badge?
McDonalds
I'm playing it!
Coca-Cola
It's the REAL game.
Raid
Kills Arachnos Dead
Quote from: Floride on November 29, 2014, 04:19:49 AM
Raid
Kills Arachnos Dead
hahahahahahahahahah I just died.
New Egg
We got every game you're looking for at really great prices!
Cryptic Studios
Hey, we made it once, we can do it again.
Subway
Play outside the bun.
Revlon
Put on your game face.
Hair Club For Men
I'm not only the Hair Club president, I'm also Manticore
Quote from: johng736@gmail.com on December 05, 2014, 01:17:45 AM
Subway
Play outside the bun.
Subway did save Chuck for a few years. Ya never know.
We are Farmers, Ba BaBABadump dum dum.
Marvel Entertainment LLC
We are hero owners, this is what we do
Hero Corps.
Because it's getting lonely in here.
Volkswagon
It's the Gamefignugen.
Southwest Airlines
We really move the game for you.
Lite Beer
Plays Great. Less Confusing.
Pixar
The cut scenes will be well animated.
General Atomics (http://www.ga.com/)
Boeing Aircraft Corporation
Let your game take flight, unless super speed is your travel power.
Oracle Corporation
Why not, they've beeen buying everything else.
Apple
City of Heroes? There's an app for that!
Quote from: johng736@gmail.com on December 17, 2014, 06:52:26 AM
Boeing Aircraft Corporation
Let your game take flight, unless super speed is your travel power.
Till it catches fire and leaks fuel like the Dreamliner!
Sony Pictures. They seem to have a good time negotiating with Koreans right now xD (Note: I know the difference between S Korea and the sad land, but this one was too easy t say)
General Electric.
Remember the GEnie network, we can do the same to CoX.
Sarah Lee
nobody does it / doesn't like Sarah Lee ... games.
Banquet Frozen Foods
City of Heroes will become the TV dinner of MMORPG'S
Quote from: johng736@gmail.com on December 20, 2014, 03:58:12 AM
General Electric.
Remember the GEnie network, we can do the same to CoX.
The beauty of this is that they would have a unique NPC in the game, named General Electric, an elec/elec blaster.
Hallmark. Everyone's shout would be replaced with a saccharin, pun-filled tagline.
Quote from: safehouse23 on December 23, 2014, 05:14:27 PM
Hallmark. Everyone's shout would be replaced with a saccharin, pun-filled tagline.
As our intrepid hero runs into battle against the dreaded Malta Group, we hear him shout, "Remember today is a gift! That's why it's called the present!"
Quote from: johng736@gmail.com on December 23, 2014, 05:21:39 PM
As our intrepid hero runs into battle against the dreaded Malta Group, we hear him shout, "Remember today is a gift! That's why it's called the present!"
Haha! Perfect!
Quote from: Sinistar on November 16, 2014, 10:57:42 AM
Budweiser
"When you've said C - O - H, you've said it all!"
(Just shows how old I am....)
Sysco
Just because you never heard of us, and probably confuse us with Cisco, doesn't mean that we can't take City of Heroes to a whole new level of food service.
Quote from: johng736@gmail.com on December 24, 2014, 05:16:24 AM
Sysco
Just because you never heard of us, and probably confuse us with Cisco, doesn't mean that we can't take City of Heroes to a whole new level of food service.
But don't confuse them with another buyer: Crisco.
Making CoH a delicious experience for all.
Nike
Just play it
Cisco
You'll need a new router to play City of Heroes.
BASF
We didn't make City of Heroes, we make it better.
Quote from: johng736@gmail.com on December 28, 2014, 06:44:57 AM
BASF
We didn't make City of Heroes, we make it better.
I crack me up.
Beach Body.
Our defenders do the p90X routine so that they can be better at buffing your characters up and de-buffing your enemies.
Keebler
City of Heroes baked in a hollow tree by elves.
Zippo Lighter
City of Heroes will stay lit, even in wind!
Hertz Rental Cars:
we game harder.
The NFL.
After all they have been training Time Manipulation Controllers for Decades.
Who else can make the final 20 seconds of a game last 30 minutes......
Hostess
We bought back the twinkie, why not City of Heroes.
Unilever
"Feel good, look good and get more out of ICON."
Apple Inc.
We can make CoH easier to use, simplier to understand and more useful.
On the down side, it will be more expensive, more exclusive and every time we make an upgrade you will have to start over from scratch.
Evco Wholesale Foods Corp.
Yeah, we're not as fancy as Sysco, the bunch of weenies, but we don't get mistaken for a high tech firm making network equipment. Sometimes we get mistaken for Evco plastics, but that's another story.
Oh, and we can do the same for City of Heroes.
Alpo.
Dogs like us, gamers love us.
Ronco
Yes, we can bring you the game-o-matic, but wait there's more.
AT&T
Well, to be frank with you, this telecommunication thing isn't working out for us, so on-line gaming might be our thing now.
Taco Bell
Because eventually ALL video games will be Taco Bell.
Manties
Because what strong, butch hero wouldn't want to wear pink lacy nylon underwear fashioned after women's panties during life and death battles.
IBM
Like City of Heroes, we were once great.
Jim Beam
City of Heroes has been in our family for seven generations.
Grue
It will be not terrible or bad or terrible.
Kraft
City of Heroes, it's the cheesiest!
Min Wax
Great for min/maxing
Elon Musk
Who better than the real life version on Tony Stark? Plus his Space X just got a cool billion from Google. The money is there and could add some good sci fi content based on their real science work.
eBay
Now you can link your Paypal and Wentworth accounts to streamline your virtual auctions!*
*Final Value fees apply
Amazon
The game client could be delivered by drones.
Weyland-Yutani
They could have a whole event where the heroes have to find a single rikti hiding in a spaceship... What can go wrong?
Sony Pictures
Imagine City of Heroes the Movie.
Of course N. Korean hackers will post the movie to the internet.
Mr. Ching's House of Dragon Warrior Noodles.
(From the second Kung Fu Panda movie.)
The Dragon Warrior knocks out bad guys, you too can knock out hungry with 2 for 1 Thursdays. And now with every purchase, free paragon points.
Skittles
Taste the rainbow of inspirations!
Dell Computers:
City of Heroes can actually run on a Dell.
Saeder-Krupp (shadowrun)
Just don't expect any dragon villains.
Sub-Way Sandwhich Shops.
They will need to change their name to Hero-Way and sell Hero Sandwhiches instead of submarine sandwhiches.
And for free-to-play gamers, they could sell poorboy sandwhiches.
Wal*Mart
If you can find a better priced game comparable to CoX, we'll match it.
(Bring in ad, and proof of ID, and be prepared to wait in line.)
The Olive Garden
When you're playing City of Heroes, you're family. (don't ask me how.)
Stuff-A-Bear
Now, you can stuff Positron, Ms. Liberty, Luminary, Back-Alley Brawler, Super Fire Dragon, and so many more of your favorite City of Heroes characters.
Lord Recluse sold seperately.
Glock
When you need a dual pistols, Assualt Rifle, or even laser rifle in City of Heroes, look no further.
Radio Shack
Quote from: hurple on February 06, 2015, 04:54:18 PM
Radio Shack
Given the news that broke about RadioShack today, it seems an even MORE improbable corporation than it already was...
Quote from: safehouse23 on February 06, 2015, 08:25:24 PM
Given the news that broke about RadioShack today, it seems an even MORE improbable corporation than it already was...
Thus, the suggestion.
RadioShack I mean Sprint.
We can make City of Heroes what it should be, if you don't go bankrupt.
Simple Machines Forum:
We could turn City of Heroes into a bulletine boards game. Just don't try to change your user name.
Five Guys
Just don't order the large King's Row.
NCSoft
Because they will build up an immensely popular and immensely community-supported game and then liquidate everything for no good reason
Quote from: Charged Mastermind on February 14, 2015, 12:28:23 AM
NCSoft
Because they will build up an immensely popular and immensely community-supported game and then liquidate everything for no good reason
It's been done.
Activia® Yogurt.
Because unlike NCSoft, they actually give a $hit. ;D (I'm sorry, I don't mean to bash NCSoft - but I just had to go for it).
Peptol-Bismol
Imagine Atlas Park covered in a thick sweet smelling pink liquid. Now that's protection.
NASCAR
Because super speed isn't just for getting to the next mission, first.
Quote from: johng736@gmail.com on February 12, 2015, 03:36:05 AM
Simple Machines Forum:
We could turn City of Heroes into a bulletine boards game. Just don't try to change your user name.
Is this a sideways request? :)
Quote from: Aggelakis on February 17, 2015, 03:50:06 AM
Is this a sideways request? :)
Well, now that you mention it. . .I would like to go by Paragon Avenger.
Quote from: johng736@gmail.com on February 17, 2015, 03:56:30 AM
Well, now that you mention it. . .I would like to go by Paragon Avenger.
*starts mumbling arcane gibberish and waving her hands 'mystically'*
*summons Tony or Sekoia*
:p
Wow, does the tingling mean it's working or that I'm having a stroke?
Quote from: johng736@gmail.com on February 17, 2015, 04:52:38 AM
Wow, does the tingling mean it's working or that I'm having a stroke?
Por que no los dos! (https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=fH4riFtVRtM)
You're giving me a headache?
Wow, that worked, my global formum name is now, The Paragon Avenger, they spell it johng736@gmail,com, silly Russians.
Missing Worlds Media
They could buy City of Heroes and create a sequel called City of Titans and ... nevermind.
Pillsbury
The enemies during the winter event will be replaced by giant doughboys.
Quote from: safehouse23 on February 18, 2015, 01:27:21 PM
Pillsbury
The enemies during the winter event will be replaced by giant doughboys.
I thought that they were doughboys. Snowmen? Are you sure?
Bayer Aspirin
You'll need it.
Wow, my name changed.
Some of my earlier posts might not make as much sense, but who reads that old junk anyways.
Thanks, Aggelakis and Sekoia!
Memorex
You can now record your missions so that you can loop them and farm even when you're not on-line.
Victoria's Secret
You might as well look sexy as you battle evil.
Chiclets
Have you had your inspiration today?
Cononco
Hottest game going.
(Wow, back when gas stations used to advertise.)
French's Mustard
Don't call us yellow.
KFC
All chickens get fried.
Kim Dotcom
Just because he can and felt like it for a minute
Olive Garden
They'll treat you like the family.
H :D :D TERS
Play Heroes at Hooters!
Delightfully catgirly yet unrefined.
Xerox
We can't actually give you City of Heroes, but we can reproduce it exactly.
Super Fire Dragon Industries, Inc., LLC.
Why not?
McGraw-Hill Publishing.
We wrote the book on MMORPG's, ok we merely published it, but what's the difference?
Tide,
Because you fight crime while we fight grime.
Esurance
Because we want to offer superhero insurance.
Taco Bell,
Come to Taco Island (Talos Island)
Dove,
We can make City of Heroes one quarter cold cream.
Kenmore,
City of Heroes, the Kenmore of MMORPG's, available only at Sears.
Napa Auto Parts,
Because we need to diversify.
Kraft Cheese and Macaroni,
It's the metal shavings-ist.
Tesla Automotive,
You can play City of Heroes while your self-driving car takes you to work. What a great way to level-up.
Chef Boy R Dee,
You like, see? City of Heroes in a can. It-a good.
Wizards of the coast,
Because we need new IP for d20 and mtg expansions
eBay
After you build a level 50+ incarnate, you can sale it on eBay.
The ACLU
because we're always fighting for your freeeem
Pringles,
Because you can stack them, and in City of Heroes you can ... (what? Oh, you can't do that in the game? I didn't know that.) ... nevermind.
Kroger
Because just like you, we have alt-itis:
(Kroger, Dillon's, Fred Meyer, Fry's, QFC, Ralph's, Smith's, Baker's, City Market, Food4Less, Foods Co, Gerble's, Jay C, King Shopper, Owen's, Pay Less super market, Harris Teeter, iWireless, Kwik Shop, Littman Jewelers, Loaf'N'Jug, QuikStop, The Little Clinic, Tom Thumb, Turkey Hill, Fred Meyer Jelewers)
As an aside, whenever you patronize any of these places, refer to it as "Loaf'N'Jug".
Fruit Loops
The best cereal to eat while you're rubber-banding.
Spandex
We supply Icon and they supply you with costumes.
Game of Thrones
Because we love any storyline that kills off the favorite characters.
Toyota,
No reason.
HBO,
That way, they could stream video of players taking down giant monsters or defeating the last A/V of a task force. HBO would actually have something good on for a change.
Rebutal by HBO: Ouch!
Checker's / Rally's,
Talking bags for everybody.
WhataBurger
WhatAHero,, Orange and White champion with a giant two handed french fry.
JJ Abrams
Reviving franchises is what i do
Harley Davidson
Praetorian by birth. Rogue by choice.
Betty Crocker
Now we have recipes that can literally make you invisible
Bush's Beans,
Because this is our hill and these are our beans.
variation on the Pringles from earlier
Once you pop SB you just cant stop!
Baldwin Piano;
We could make City of Heroes the Steinway of MMO's.
Rubbermaid
We make everything else, so why not games?
Pizza Hut,
Imagine stuffed crust Rikti.
Bang & Olufsen:
They will make the game superb.
Nobody will be able to afford it, but it will be superb.
Enterprise Rental Car,
They will have a service that will pick you up and take you to your contact.
Red Bull
It gives you wings... and jet packs... and teleportation... and...
The Law Offices of Chris Jenkins,
They will put an end to people getting injured in Superhero actions.
Nyquil
The night ward sniveling sneering scoffing staking scruffyhead enemies you can arrest medecine.
Dynex keyboards,
If you're anything like my friend, sometimes you take getting choakified out on the keyboard.
(I was pushing the key and nothing happened.)
Dynex makes nice cheap keyboards.
Valve.
Then we'd certainly get a City of Heroes 2... but on the downside we'll never ever get a City of Heroes 3.
Quote from: gruegirl on May 15, 2015, 01:56:32 PM
Valve.
Then we'd certainly get a City of Heroes 2... but on the downside we'll never ever get a City of Heroes 3.
We'd also get good mod support and a pithy song at the end, but unfortunately the greenlight system for new stuff would be shit :P
Also Blizzard; They'd perfect the character creator to a ridiculous degree, everything would become really atmospheric, but then we'd also get raids and lots of grinding
Quote from: Blackout on May 15, 2015, 03:17:05 PM
We'd also get good mod support and a pithy song at the end, but unfortunately the greenlight system for new stuff would be pancake :P
Also Blizzard; They'd perfect the character creator to a ridiculous degree, everything would become really atmospheric, but then we'd also get raids and lots of grinding
Lets not also forget enforced holy trinity by blizzard probably making all buffs/debuffs/crowd control useless and having every raid comprised of the exact same tactic.
BP Oil
If it turns into a disaster and hemorrhages money, we can keep it going for another at least another few months
Maytag;
There could run the game without GM's.
(the game would be so depenable that the help-desk people would be lonely and bored.)
PlaSkol,
They would replace all the enhancements with big brightly colored enhancements. That way we couldn't shallow and choke on them. And all the sharp and pointy edges would be rounded so we can't hurt ourselves. And all the bad guys would be sent to bed early. And all powersets would have a nap power. And all the stairs would have gates across them.
Anheuser-Busch
Turning Altaholics into Alcoholics, one game at a time.
Quote from: Floride on May 18, 2015, 09:16:47 PM
Anheuser-Busch
Turning Altaholics into Alcoholics, one game at a time.
Beer-glorious, beer!
Cheese,
Yes, cheese. Big cheese should buy CoX and replace all the eat emotes with cheese graphics. Plus, each paid subscription will receive a membership in the Cheese-of-the-Month club. Yes, you too can fight the sky raiders while enjoying swiss cheese, or a nice bree.
Ivory Soap,
They could really clean-up the city.
Electronic Arts
Oops, sorry. We thought this was a sports game franchise.
Quote from: Floride on May 25, 2015, 04:31:57 AM
Electronic Arts
Oops, sorry. We thought this was a sports game franchise.
So they turned it into one.
Now, instead of firing off a power, you control the movements of your character.
The Z button is to pick up shovel
The X button swings the shovel back
The trigger button swings the shovel at your opponent.
A version for the Wii is planned for the fall.
Lipitor ---
Why not, they have everybody's money who is over 40.
Ritalin for the boys
Lipitor for the adult men
Flomax for the middle-aged men
Viagra for the senior men
Ritalin = green inspiration
Lipitor = red inspiration
Flomax = yellow inspiration
Viagra = blue inspiration
City of Heroes is a lot like a drug store, so Walgreens should buy the game.
DevExpress and Infragistrics
Together they could improve the controls and make a much richer UX for the gamer.
Visine,
It gets the red out.
(I don't know does anybody still read this thread?)
I do. It's fun seeing the improbable setups and slogans.
HYDRA: for every MMO killed, two will take its place.
Monsanto: Mutants are people too.
Bic Lighters
Giving heroes in Steel Canyon something else to do since 2008
I don't want a corporation to buy CoX, I want Vladimir Putin to buy CoX and relaunch it.
"I dare you shut down."
Tonight's Top Story:
"City of Heroes/City of Villains made headlines today when they unilaterally invaded and annexed DC Universe Online, Guild Wars 1 & 2, and the Peoples' Democratic Republic of the Congo. When asked what prompted these heinous and unprovoked attacks, President Putin simply responded, "More room Super Jump."."
THeM,
I run it so that neither NCSoft nor anybody else can shut it down while it is profitable.
Blue Cross/Blue Shield
All hospital visits now require a paragon points co-pay
Quote from: Floride on June 20, 2015, 01:26:09 PM
Blue Cross/Blue Shield
All hospital visits now require a paragon points co-pay
Noooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooo!
XMPP,
That way City of Heroes will have a more modern chat client built in.
Taco Bell
In the future ALL video games will be Taco Bell
Amiga.
As the premier product of their new Toastertm
Quote from: Victoria Victrix on June 25, 2015, 12:08:26 PM
Amiga.
As the premier product of their new Toastertm
This one stung.
I worked for a neo-Amiga corporation at one point.
Samsung,
They could port it over to a smart-phone client. We will need to have smaller fingers to tap the powers in the trays.
Victoria's Secret.
Then it would have an expansion pack: City of Eros.
Quote from: Tubbius on June 25, 2015, 11:10:20 PM
Victoria's Secret.
Then it would have an expansion pack: City of Eros.
Ha! Loved it
Quote from: Tubbius on June 25, 2015, 11:10:20 PM
Victoria's Secret.
We already had buxom half-naked characters with wings, and they could actually fly, so I'm not sure what they could contribute.
Quote from: Arcana on June 25, 2015, 11:41:18 PM
We already had buxom half-naked characters with wings, and they could actually fly, so I'm not sure what they could contribute.
Bras with Knockback! Oh wait, I'm thinking of Blade & Soul, nevermind ;D
Canon,
Better games make better pictures, so don't miss that Kodak moment.
Rolls Royce,
The cadillac of cars and of games.
Amway
For a real Pyramid Scheme
Scots Tissues,
Next time you need a kleneex, reach for Scot's.
Fruit of the Loom,
That way, the underwear or bottoms in the game will look better. Like fun strips and cute prints for the women, and bolder colors and a fly front for the guys.
Armani
Everyone will be wearing Crey Suits.
SCI Cemeteries
This week only - half off all nemesis plots!
If you think about it steam could buy it
Proctor & Gamble,
Proctor could gamble on CoX and win.
Big Tobacco,
Yup, with fewer and fewer suckers smoking, they could get money from on-line gaming.
Sara Lee
Nobody doesn't like City of Heroes
Quote from: Tubbius on June 14, 2015, 06:22:50 AM
I do. It's fun seeing the improbable setups and slogans.
Thanks, you single-handedly got this topic going again.
Dolce and Gabana
Icon will be fabulous.
Funk & Wagnalls,
That way all the NPC's would be speaking proper English.
Quote from: Paragon Avenger on July 02, 2015, 11:57:35 PM
Thanks, you single-handedly got this topic going again.
I did? YAY! :)
I wonder if I could do that for
City of Heroes, though. . . .
The BBC should totally buy city of heroes cause then we can add Doctor WHO and Monty Python stuff to our game universe.
and stuff from all the other shows BBC but most people don't know about. because they think the BBC only does the shows Americans obsess over. :P
Ben and Jerrys
They can add three new flavors
Caped Crunch, Villainous Vanilla Fudge, and Enriched Gold (but after eating the third, you won't remember you had it).
Mozilla
We are the free and open web, this is what we do
Radio Shack?
(too soon?)
Codewalker,
The thing would be running smoother than ever, more robust, most of the bugs fixed, and stupid stories like the origin of origins would be gone.
Codewalker, I'll loan ya twenty until pay-day if that will help.
The company Dilbert works for,
It can't be much worse than what we have now.
Quote from: Paragon Avenger on July 11, 2015, 01:58:01 AM
The company Dilbert works for,
It can't be much worse than what we have now.
I can see his boss now - "The game doesn't have enough paying customers. See if the Elbonians can find a way to use fewer punch cards in the mainframes."
Hallmark Cards,
They could tie-in game credit cards into birthday cards.
"When you care enough, to play the very best."
(The entire Hallmark family is going to sue me over that one.)
Gene Simmons
Yet another thing he can slap the name KISS all over
Quote from: Floride on July 13, 2015, 01:39:10 AM
Gene Simmons
Yet another thing he can slap the name KISS all over
City of Kiss! The Kiss army rocks the Arachnos or the longbow depending on your color (blue/red).
Quote from: Paragon Avenger on July 15, 2015, 03:16:55 AM
City of Kiss! The Kiss army rocks the Arachnos or the longbow depending on your color (blue/red).
I did this in demo mode a while back...(https://images.weserv.nl/?url=img201.imageshack.us%2Fimg201%2F245%2Fhbandkiss.png)
Barnes & Noble,
Why risk YOUR life battling enemies when you can sit back, relax and read about it.
Teflon,
Nothing sticks, not even street gangs and evil corporations (crey).
Mounds & Almond Joy,
Because, sometimes you feel like a hero, sometimes you don't.
DuPont
You like spandex? You're welcome.
Gillete,
As good as a hero can get.
Big Bingo,
We can call out numbers with the best of them, and by numbers we mean missions.
Franzia,
We put wine in boxes, we can do the same for City of Merlot Heroes.
Marvel Comics
Yeah. Riiiiiiiigggghhhhttttt!!!
Suave Shampoo
We'll make you look as if you spent a fortune on your costume.
FEMA
We finally found a way to sit around & do nothing AND finally get to be heroes.
Tyson,
Because there ain't no chicken in Paragon City.
Coca-Cola
All that billboard space in Paragon City screams for naming rights. Share a Coke with xxxxx!
Quote from: wrkidd on August 06, 2015, 12:03:06 AM
Coca-Cola
All that billboard space in Paragon City screams for naming rights. Share a Coke with xxxxx!
Of Course!
Share a Coke with Lord Recluse
Quote from: Paragon Avenger on August 06, 2015, 12:48:20 AM
Of Course!
Share a Coke with Lord Recluse
Hahaha. Can you imagine the Mean Joe Green ad with Recluse instead?
Sony
Because everything needs to be converted to blu-ray
Quote from: Felderburg on August 06, 2015, 03:43:13 AM
Hahaha. Can you imagine the Mean Joe Green ad with Recluse instead?
A Coke in every tentacle?
"Hey kid!" and then throwing the kid his helmet?
Yup. :)
Quote from: Tubbius on August 10, 2015, 12:06:28 PM
A Coke in every tentacle?
"Hey kid!" and then shooting the kid with an Arachnos Rifle.
Yup. :)
MCI Software,
They have to be better than NCSoft.
Hostess
We're shutting it down... oh wait, maybe we're not
Meow Mix,
Half the players of City of Heroes think they are or want to be cats anyway.
Greece
They could really use an investment that always makes money
Donald Bren,
He's the other successful real estate tycoon named Donald that we never hear from.
Buying NCSoft would be chump change to this guy.
Office Depot,
Because ... ummm ... because ... because when it comes to school suplies, no that ain't it.
just because.
Isn't it obvious to everyone who the big bidder is to buy the COH's IP rights? The United States' NASA for simulated space exploration by heroes! 8)
The Army Corps of Engineers
Base design is paragon to us!
Crazy talk, but currently Funcom is looking for capital because they fail to meet their forecast and needs to think of new ways to repay their debt in 2016:
http://www.bloomberg.com/news/articles/2015-08-07/funcom-reviews-options-as-sales-lag-on-lego-game-amid-debt-talks
"The company is actively seeking interested parties for discussions surrounding a possible investment, acquisition, merger or any other available options," Funcom said in a statement on Friday. ABG Sundal Collier will undertake "a broad review of the strategic options available to the company," the Badhoevedorp, Netherlands-based company said."
Meanwhile on the other side of entertainment spectrum Mattel has been in a tailspin downward due to being bested by rival toy maker, Hasbro in earnings, three top executives leaving the company, and the lack of ingenuity to attach new market. Because of all this, Citigroup lowered Mattel's stock projection from $34 to $27 per share.
http://www.wsj.com/articles/mattel-senior-executive-tim-kilpin-leaving-in-november-1439405644
http://www.moneyflowindex.org/mattel-inc-analyst-rating-update/3106526/
The new brass seeing that plastic trinkets are not as profitable as they once were, Mattel decides to diversify and go into the MMO business by either buying majority share in Funcom or just over taking them. From there, Mattel also knows that they need fresh IPs to booster sales and they catch wind City of Heroes is being sold (or potentially sold) by NCSoft. Mattel take their Fortune 500 boot and stuffs it up NCSoft obtaining the IP. From there, not only does Mattel hire a solid team for the games under their control (not just CoX, but AoC, TSW, etc) they also improve on them (even developing a CoX 2) Along side with the new MMOs, Mattel, still staying true to their plastic trinket will start making action figures and sets for the new IPs. This will lead to more boost in revenue because these "toys" will not just appeal to kids (generally Mattel demo appears to be from 2-12 years old) but rabid fanboys will buy these in the drove. Mattel becomes profitable again, taking out Hasbro, CoX is saved, and everyone is happy. Course this is a pipe dream
Timex,
Just like you heroes (and villians) it takes a lickin' and keeps on tickin'.
N. Korea,
Of course they might not actually "buy" it.
Capital One
What's in YOUR spandex?
Mr. & Mrs. T blood-mary mix,
I pity the fool who doesn't play City of Heroes.
Clorox Bleach,
Drink bleach and die you <gratefruit> villian(or hero depending)!!!
Oxydol,
because 20 mules really isn't enough.
Hasbro.
Because getting City of Heroes back online is only slightly easier than winning at a game of Mouse Trap.
Pants,
Cause there's nothing like a good pair of pants.
(sponsored by Pants, not affliated with Worldwide Pants Inc.)
Sharon Osbourne
She's proven she can relaunch ANYTHING
Baskin Robbins
Because they find out. Baskin Robbins always finds out.
Pfizer
If they get the game up it will be like Viagra for MMORPGs.
Zulilly,
I don't know, they have TV commerials, so they must be good.
Allstate
This game can finally be in good hands
The Law Offices of Dewey, Cheatum and Howe,
I would trust them.
Konami.
City of Heroes Pachislot, HERE WE GO!
Beggin' Strips:
Tankers don't know it's not City of Heroes.
Beggin' Strips:
Blasters don't know it's not City of Heroes.
Beggin' Strips:
Masterminds don't know it's not zombies.
The Law Office of Maybe & I'Dunno.
You want CoH back? You dunno! Is there an IP, is there a deal? We can make it happen, or maybe we can't. We dunno! You might be entitled to compensation if there is or isn't, if someone wants or doesn't want you should call us. Should you call us? Probably! We dunno! You don't even know if CoH shutdown. Maybe it did. Call this number!
1-800-UH-IDUNNO
QuoteThanks to Maybe & I'Dunno, not only did I get off for killing my ex but they helped me hide the body. Thanks guys!
CALL US NOW!
QuoteAfter my granpa died, I didn't know what to do. Or you know what, maybe I did. I dunno.. Either way, the Law Offices of Maybe & I'Dunno got me a huge settlement.
The Law Offices of Maybe & I'Dunno. Call us at 1-800-UH-IDUNNO
General Electric,
GE we bring good things to MMORPG's.
Arachnos
Bad guys that go crunch.
Lego.
Just so they can import yet another property into Lego Dimensions.
Legos, the complete City of Heroes set.
I love it.
Quote from: Tubbius on September 28, 2015, 04:06:29 AM
Legos
Quote from: Paragon Avenger on September 28, 2015, 04:12:45 AM
Legos, the complete City of Heroes set.
I love it.
Ragdoll knockback physics ain't got NOTHING on being able to just remove a Hellion's upper half from his legs.
Legos are just 3-D pixels. All the world is a computer MMORPG.
(can I re-roll?)
Quote from: Paragon Avenger on September 29, 2015, 02:29:59 AM
Legos are just 3-D pixels. All the world is a computer MMORPG.
(can I re-roll?)
That explains why
The Lego Movie beat out
Pixels, right?
Krazy Glue,
we can hold City of Heroes together.
Everything is awesome, when you're part of a team.
Crom.
Crom, grant us the way to play our City again. And if you do not listen, THEN TO HELL WITH YOU!
Johnsonville Sausage,
because we make families and we can make City of Heroes,
(we also make sausage too)
Tang,
If it's good enough for astronauts, it's good enough for City of Heroes.
Bacon,
Everybody loves bacon, (turkey bacon for our non-pork eating friends)
So it almost follows that everybody would love City of Heroes (Turkey City of Heroes for the non-pork eaters)
Quote from: Paragon Avenger on October 03, 2015, 05:40:44 PM
Bacon,
Everybody loves bacon, (turkey bacon for our non-pork eating friends)
So it almost follows that everybody would love City of Heroes (Turkey City of Heroes for the non-pork eaters)
And vegetarians?
Quote from: Paragon Avenger on October 03, 2015, 05:40:44 PM
Bacon,
Everybody loves bacon, (turkey bacon for our non-pork eating friends)
So it almost follows that everybody would love City of Heroes (Turkey City of Heroes for the non-pork eaters)
And I forgot to mention soy-based bacon-flavored products for the non-meat eaters.
So that would make it City of Soy for the non-meat eaters.
Iron Wolf,
All the NPC's could be snippy.
United Airlines,
Come play the friendly skies with us.
Dry-Wall,
Yes, faster and less expensive than lathe and paste walls, Dry-Wall can have City of Heroes built in days, not months.
Bootstrap,
Yup, the MIT grid framework for building websites. Just don't name a toon col-md-12.
Nexon,
In a clever power play, Nexon buys CoH and can position the game at the top of the on-line gaming world. Most of the CoH players have a deep-sedded hatred of NCSoft and will gladly boycott their games. This will most likely under-cut any successor project. A perfect trianglation that certain politians would even be proud of.
DMC (Dolorean Motor Company),
Well, I figured, why not a Dolorean.
(In honor of Oct 21 2015, time-travel day.)
Butterball Turkeys,
When you want a nice baked turkey or a MMORPG, get a Butterball.
World of Warcraft,
So they can see what a REAL game is like.
Paradox Interactive:
CoH will now be a grand strategy game, based around Arachnos conquering the world.
Quote from: Blackgrue on October 29, 2015, 07:52:12 PM
Paradox Interactive:
CoH will now be a grand strategy game, based around Arachnos conquering the world.
My widow thought that it already was.
Tobasco Sauce,
Made with authenic 1's and 0's for over four generations.
Brokers Gin,
The world's best MMORPG.
Oscar Meyer,
Oh my MMORPG has a first name, it's C-I-T-Y. My MMORPG has a second name it's, O-F H-E-R-O-E-S
How's that?
Two Broke Girls,
CoX might be funny.
Payless Shoe Source,
Our MMORPG, looks just as good as the department store brands for a whole lot less.
Subscribe to two games and get the third game half-off.
Liberty Mutual Insurance.
There would be a commercial for it every 15 minutes.
State Farm Insurance,
Any time you get in over your head, just sing, "Like a good neighbor, state farm is there." And a police drone will appear, or villain equivalent.
Butterball or Honeysuckle or Riverside or etc.
When they have City of Heroes, they will no longer only deal in turkeys.
The Bailey Loan and Trust,
Ever see the movie, "It's A Wonderful Life", well City of Heroes will be a wonderful game, again.
Moe's
Who will quickly change their name to El Super Mexicano, and rebrand the Homewrecker to the Back Alley Brawler.
W3 (the people who decide how the internet works.),
They could publish 1000 page document detailing how the game play tags should work inside a browser. Maybe 5 years later, IE and Crome will be able to run it.
Canon,
With everybody taking selfies, nobody needs SLR's anymore. Canon should deversify.
Toastmaster toasters,
Yes there is actually a company named toastmaster that makes toasters.
Anyway, they could make City of Heroes half-baked, just like toast.
or, they could turn City of Heroes into toast.
or something like that, the jokes are piling up on this side.
Macy's
Just think of all the miracles they could make, not only on 34th street, but throughout Kings Row.
EverNote,
That way, every time you get defeated, it can be saved and accessed by your mobile, and your PC at home and your PC at work and your tablet and your spouse's phone and tablet and PC and there is no way to delete it, ever.
Eliquis,
City of Heroes would be much better off than with Warfarin.
M. Lackey et al,
They could simply write City of Heroes back into existence.
Crey Corp.
They could control it better and turn Blue side into a Crey version of Red side. Wait, maybe that's not such a good idea after all.
Matching Pen and Pencil,
Just what I needed, how nice.
Cheese Donuts,
That's what City of Heroes needs, a dozen cheese donuts right in the kisser.
The Malta Group,
Maybe then we would be rid of Angry Giant Penguins rampaging through the city.
World of Warcraft,
They could ruin thegame just as well as the next company.
Hungry Jack brand,
You could fill up on enhancements while you're eating easy to make food.
Motorhead,
They need something to do, now...
Jack Daniels,
There number one consumer is gone, they might need to make money by other means.
J.J. Abrams
He can revive anything
I think Steam should start a service with servers running games that shut down.Tabula Rasa and CoH would be a nice start.They could charge a monthly fee for access to all games.The people that own the games make money,steam makes money and we get to have a place to play all the games that are lost to us now.
State Government,
Hey, they can't screw it up too badly, it's already shut down.
Necrophillia,
Imagine all the zombies.
L.L.Beam,
Imagine the upgraded costume designer.
Funk&Wagnalls,
All the NPC dialog would be spelled correctly. The NPC's might even use proper grammar.
Umbrella Corporation
Our Business Is Life Itself.
Veterans of Foreign Wars,
screw you civil war vets, and we can do the same to CoH.
Roman Meal Bread,
Loved by Cimerorans everywhere.
Coca-Cola
They can release the Titan project as "New CoH" and then release the original as "CoH Classic".
Coca-Cola could then release a F2P version called Diet-Coke, if you want the sugar, you have to pay.
Quote from: Baaleos on January 27, 2016, 04:07:27 PM
Coca-Cola could then release a F2P version called Diet-Coke, if you want the sugar, you have to pay.
Missed it by that much, the free 2 play version would be Coke Zero.
Pepsi One & Coke Zero,
Together, they can write any computer code, after all, it's only ones and zeroes.
Pepsi Free,
Pepsi Free has released free to play versions of all MMO's.
3M
NCSoft may refuse to sell the IP, but we at 3m have an endless supply of red tape.
Velcro,
CoH could be the hooks while CoV could be the loops. Or the other way 'round.
When asked, a spokesperson said, "We have no idea where Praetoria fits into this."
General Motors
But, like everything else, they'd probably just outsource it's development overseas.
Like maybe... South Korea?
Google,
Instead of defeating a foe, you search him to dearh.
Bob Dole,
There could be bananas and other fruit in game. Also, plenty of canned fruit, instesad of enhancements.
No-Doze,
You don't want to fall asleep and miss the grand re-launch of City of Heroes.
Gideons International.
They have Bibles in every hotel and motel room, MMO's logically would be next.
Gene Simmons
Because the KISS logo needs to eventually be on everything.
You wanted the best, you got the best: City of KISS.
Quote from: Paragon Avenger on February 12, 2016, 03:04:34 AM
Google,
Instead of defeating a foe, you search him to dearh.
Searching someone to death.
Isn't that more the airline security folks than Google?
TSA,
They will search the foes to death, and make them take off their shoes.
(Thanks, Tubs.)
Bob Dole,
Since he didn't get elected president, he has a lot of spare time. Or was that Deb Bolo?
V.I.P.E.R. (from Champions) What better way to destroy the world, than to bring back a game that would compete with the very existence of your own world?
Quote from: Kruhl Sentru on March 23, 2016, 08:05:45 PM
V.I.P.E.R. (from Champions) What better way to destroy the world, than to bring back a game that would compete with the very existence of your own world?
Beats me, man.
Detroit
Any source of income is better than none.
Quote from: Floride on March 24, 2016, 03:55:42 AM
Detroit
Any source of income is better than none.
Yes, but why throw money into a burning pit?
Quote from: Floride on March 24, 2016, 03:55:42 AM
Detroit
Just because they ignored the small car market for decades.
When they did dip their toes into it, they made:
The Corvair...a death trap
The Pinto...a firey death trap
And just because they built-in failure, so that people would need to buy a new one every few years.
And just because fuel economy to them is 20 miles to the gallon
Is that any reason to make fun of them?
It sure is!
The United States Postal Service,
Only they could take three years to buy a game ... never mind.
One of those Chinese corporations that make knock-offs of well-known products: i.e. the makers of Parasonic Batteries, Somy TVs, Oinkyo audio equipment or Starbux coffee:
COH released as :
Town of Vanquishers (based in the city of Paradigm)
Protectorburg (based in the city of Parasynthesis)
City of Hearohs
or
Pity of Heroes
Quote from: crashpositron on April 07, 2016, 10:16:08 PM
One of those Chinese corporations that make knock-offs of well-known products: i.e. the makers of Parasonic Batteries, Somy TVs, Oinkyo audio equipment or Starbux coffee:
COH released as :
Town of Vanquishers (based in the city of Paradigm)
Protectorburg (based in the city of Parasynthesis)
City of Hearohs
or
Pity of Heroes
In case you missed it, NCSoft tried to launch an Asian version of CoH years ago which lasted about 5 minutes, but that name... oh that name...
(https://images.weserv.nl/?url=pds13.egloos.com%2Fpds%2F200812%2F22%2F64%2Fd0053364_494f6147200df.jpg)
I was thinking City of Hiro
Interesting "poster boy" hero there on the City of Hero screen. I wonder what his name and backstory and power set are.
Quote from: Tubbius on April 09, 2016, 02:41:05 PM
Interesting "poster boy" hero there on the City of Hero screen. I wonder what his name and backstory and power set are.
The character's name is Foreshadow (http://paragonwiki.com/wiki/Foreshadow), he and Mirror Spirit (http://paragonwiki.com/wiki/Mirror_Spirit) were pretty much the only vestiges of City of Hero that got retained in CoH, so far as I recall.
Quote from: Canine on April 10, 2016, 11:51:56 AM
The character's name is Foreshadow (http://paragonwiki.com/wiki/Foreshadow), he and Mirror Spirit (http://paragonwiki.com/wiki/Mirror_Spirit) were pretty much the only vestiges of City of Hero that got retained in CoH, so far as I recall.
Oh yeah! That dude from the Hollows! :D
Energizer Batteries,
All endurance powers, enhancements, inspirations, boosts and bonues would be battery based. And there would be a new spring event, around Easter, where a huge rabbit beating a drum terorrizes the city zones.
FEMA
It's been a long time since the sunset, they should be almost ready to swoop in and try to rescue whats left of the game now.
Glad Bags,
Because there would be bags of gladness when CoX returns.
A calendar maker,
Come on peoples, it's been like a few weeks since the shut-down. What's taking so long?
A drive-in movie chain,
You would login and control your character on the big screen, it would almost work.
Quote from: Canine on April 10, 2016, 11:51:56 AM
The character's name is Foreshadow (http://paragonwiki.com/wiki/Foreshadow), he and Mirror Spirit (http://paragonwiki.com/wiki/Mirror_Spirit) were pretty much the only vestiges of City of Hero that got retained in CoH, so far as I recall.
Apparently there was also a capeless Statesman
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=3r24wkTxMcQ (https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=3r24wkTxMcQ)
Quote from: Kruhl Sentru on March 23, 2016, 08:05:45 PM
V.I.P.E.R. (from Champions) What better way to destroy the world, than to bring back a game that would compete with the very existence of your own world?
Hey, you might not have been very far off from the truth, because it appears that Cryptic Studios did indeed offer to buy CoX from NCSoft after the shutdown, according to Christopher Bruce's (Back Alley Brawler's) recent Ask Me Anything. ;) I look at it like Cryptic would have had the market cornered; whenever they would have lost an exiting CO superhero gaming fan to DCUO or Marvel, CoX would have been a way to keep them in the fold instead.
Maybe CO and CoX could have even run cross-game story arcs at certain points or something.... So you might have hit the nail on the head there, had things played out differently on NCSoft's end. ;)
Apple.
Stick CoH on iOS.
Azrael.
Quote from: Azrael on May 13, 2016, 09:35:20 AM
Apple.
Stick CoH on iOS.
Azrael.
Imagine gameplay, with an iPod like wheel.
Raspberry PI,
City of Heroes is now a mid-level difficultty project for electronics/computer science students at the 8th grade level. Each student who completes the project in the allotted time will receive an "auto-pen" signed certificate from the school's principal.
Paragon Chat,
Afterall, they are making money hand-over-fist from PC, they can easily afford to purchase CoX.
Goodyear Tire and Rubber Company,
That way we will know that the game will be 'round a while.
Hanes,
Because even superheroes wear underwear, on the outside---weirdos.
The BBC.
So we can finally recolor that phone booth in that one zone. . . .
GE,
All the electricity powersets would get un-nerfed.
RAID,
Maybe then some of the bugs will be out of the game.
Staples,
That way, they will never run out of rubber-bands.
Penzoyle,
Is that improbable enough for you?
Mr & Mrs. T Bloody Mary Mix,
When you want a Bloody Mary and are too hung-over to mix tomato juice with Worchester sauce, Mr. & Mr.s T Bloody Mary Mix is right there to help. And they can do the same for City of Heroes too.
(https://i.imgur.com/7hrVGRi.jpg)
Boeing,
That way, we will all be able to fly.
Gilliet or Schliek,
That way, we can get out of those hairy missions.
Gloria Steinem
Although she'd probably want to re-title it City of Heroines.
Dr. Evil...for the win!
Enron,
Oh, never mind.
Bic,
Making pens and lighters that last, maybe the game will last a while too.
Rollex,
When you got to know the time surrounded by diamonds, City of Heroes is it.
Kay Jewelers,
Every Knockback, knockdown or kill begins with K.
SubWay sandwhich shops,
Kill Fresh!
Liberty Mutual Insurance,
They could move the game to New Jersey where they would be a view of the Statue of Liberty in the background.
Samsung,
They would probably just make it better, but only after Apple made it better first.
McDonald's,
Frostfire would be replaced by the Ham Buggler. Ms. Liberty would be replaced by Ronald himself.
And Positron would continually ask if you want french fries with that.
Teddy Bears,
Like Champions online, you could turn into a teddy bear.
Also, one of the most firece villian groups, the Teddy Bear gang; with their candy-cane sucker punch power.
Make the angry Teddy Bears go away.
(maybe if I put on a pair of pants ... )
Pants,
All CoX players would have to wear pants, all the time.
>:( Blasphemy.
Pringles,
Only, the bad guys would stack-up nearly after being defeated.
Bob Dole,
He could, well, he might, well that Aggy person seemed to think that he could do something.
Gru Industries,
Hey, he can't do much worst than Lord Recluse.
Toyota,
They seem to know how to make cars, maybe they can make MMO's too.
Paragon Avenger Studios,
If it's great, we probably did it.*
*does not actually imply any credit for any great thing real or imagined.
Super Fire Dragon & Associates,
SFD&A are the only corporation posed to take complete control over CoH, Cov, Praetoria a.k.a. Going Rogue. SFD&A have the finanical, technicol, and story skills; plus Super Fire Dragon himself.
So ask for SFD&A by name!
Spaltoon,
It's for babies
NC Soft,
Hey, they did it once, they can do it again!
Arcana,
Why not?
Apple,
So they can make something in the USA.
Carrier,
They have promised to make stuff in the U.S.A. and since their furnances and air conditioners [work great] maybe they can [not] screw-up CoX.
Pepper Potts,
She has wisely invested in Stark Industries and Wayne Industries. She is now worth more than Richie Rich, but no where near Scrooge McDuck. She can easily afford it.
Richie Rich,
He wanted to try it out, he had heard so many great things about it, so he bought it from NCSoft and hired CodeWalker et al to run and maintain the game. The Paragon Avenger was put in for Statesman.
Scooge,
Blah, hum-bug, to all other MMO's!
Quote from: Paragon Avenger on December 20, 2016, 02:41:44 AM
Scooge,
Blah, hum-bug, to all other MMO's!
Ebenezer, or McDuck?
Now that Scrooge has purchased City of Heroes,
There are a few changes:
- No more silly free-to-play non-sense
- Pay to play
- Pay to win
- Heck, pay to get a mission
- There is now a 5% surcharge on everything
- No more free gifts, humming in the streets
- Yes, pay to click
- Pay to level
- And killer interest
- Usery, ha more like Uberary
- Pay to stand around dancing
- All emotes cost money
- Pay to lose, even
- Some of us would still want to play
Comquat Growers Association of America:
Did you read the latest Fake News? That's why.
Umbrella Corporation
But they are taking a rain check
Has anyone checked with WayneTech?
Society for Circular Arguments
Quote from: Power Gamer on January 07, 2017, 04:05:39 PM
Society for Circular Arguments
Why should they buy it?
Because they are going to buy it.
Stark Industries was all set to buy City of heroes, but at the last minute, Tony changed the company to a retail furniture chain. That man has got to stay out of caves.
Acme Labs,
They can fool Pinky and The Brain into taking over Paragon City as an expriment in behavioral science. It's brillant!
Quote from: Paragon Avenger on May 06, 2015, 06:12:25 AM
Baldwin Piano;
We could make City of Heroes the Steinway of MMO's.
I crack me up. (that's one)
Rubbermaid,
No game is made like City of Heroes.
Paragon Transit Authority,
In a clever attempt to stir up ridership, the PTA has purchased the game City of Heroes in which it is the transportation system. When asked for comment, a PTA offical who didn't wish to be identified said, "Just because we only exist inside an MMO that has been shut-down for over 4 years, is no reason why we can't step-in, save the day, and buy the thing."
Staples,
There would be a new button in your nav window. The button would appear at certain times, just like the blue exit button would appear at mission end. This new button will be red and say, "Easy" in friendly white letters. Whenever things seemed too difficult for the player, the "Easy" button would appear. When clicked, it would take the difficulty setting down a notch or three and maybe even lower the level of the enemy some.
The Sunglass Hut.
Yup, this multi-billion dollar franchise-only company has been secretly amassing an arsenal of ready cash to purchase weak MMO companies like NCSoft that are poorly run and mismanaged. The Sunglass Hut promises few changes to the game with the slight exception that ALL NPC's will be wearing Sunglasses.
The Paragon Avenger,
Who else has more to gain from avenging a game set in Paragon City?
NesTea,
Seeking to branch out into the online-gaming industry, NesTea has purchased City of Heroes from NCSoft for an undisclosed amount of influence, even more than 10,000i. NesTea will re-launch the game soonTM and plans only minor changes. Like Enriche will be replaced with NesTea. All the billboards will feature NesTea advertisments, and the drink emote and teabag emote will feature NesTea.
Personal note, I don't care if my characters' costumes said 'NesTea' all over them, I would still play City of Heroes.
The IRS,
I just finished filing my taxes, they can afford to buy it.
M&M Mars,
We know chocolate. We know how to entice you. And we can do the same for City of Warcraft or whatever it is called.
United Airlines
Cuz, why should NCSoft have all the fun?
Quote from: Power Gamer on April 23, 2017, 02:49:33 AM
United Airlines
Cuz, why should NCSoft have all the fun?
Make a boneheaded move in City of Heroes and two armed guards come and drag you off the team.
Hey, maybe that could be the new 'kicked' animation.
Dollar Tree
Spanx!
Evian
Quote from: Power Gamer on May 02, 2017, 10:34:43 PM
Evian
Evian, because if you think this isn't ordinary tap-water, you're naive. And we can do the same for City of Heroes!
Quote from: Paragon Avenger on May 08, 2017, 06:40:31 AM
Evian, because if you think this isn't ordinary tap-water, you're naive. And we can do the same for City of Heroes!
You mean "Seoreh fo Ytic?"
Spam!
What are you hungry for when you're hungry for spam? Hey, it's cheap and not horrible when fired well done or al dente. Anyway, we can do the same for City of Heroes.
Cheetos,
They will replace Ms. Liberty with Chester Cheetah, but other than that, its win-win.
City of Heroes, the MMORPG that goes CRUNCH!
DC Comics!
All the heroes will be dark, angsty anti-heroes and uber-violent. Every mish will be a new 'Origin' story, and the game will be retconned every 12 months or so.
Only Ms Liberty will be like you remember her.
Mercedes-Benz,
We are the Cadillac of cars, and we can do the same for City of Heroes. Wait a minute!
People worry about DC Comics or Marvel Comics.
I say, Hanna-Barbera,
They could make City of Heroes "smarter than the average MMO!"
Crest,
Ms. Liberty (holding a box of Crest toothpaste): For a brighter smile and refresher breath, I never defeat a bad-guy without it.
Dove,
Ms. Liberty (holding a box of Dove Soap): With one quarter cleansing cream, Dove helps the women of Paragon City look super.
Tide,
Ms. Liberty (holding a box of Tide Soap): We superheroes must stay clean, and nothing removes tough sewer stains better. I use it on all my uniforms, no matter where I might be next.
Dawn,
Ms. Liberty (holding a bottle of Dawn Soap): Some bad guys or so slimy and oily, Dawn gets grease out of the way. When I wash the dishes, I always use Dawn.
.
Samsung,
Ms. Liberty (holding a Samsung Galaxy Note S8): To keep in contact with your contacts, use Samsung brand smart phones and Tablets. Samsung, the only smart phone I use, when my iPhone is charging..
.
Minute Rice,
Ms. Liberty (holding a box of Minute Rice): You know, with all the crime fighting, training, task forces and dancing we supers do, we don't have time to cook. That's where Minute Rice comes in. It is ready in 5 minutes and is very yummy.
Popeye Spinach,
Ms. Liberty (holding a can of Popeye Spinach): You know, when I want to have some spinach, I choose Popeye Spinach. And you should too.
Penzoil,
Ms. Liberty (holding up a can of Penzoil): You know, I rely heavily on my non-existant vehicle. So I protect it by changing the engine oil as reccomended by the manufacturer, and using Penzoil brand oil. Ask for it by name.
These remind me of the old Frosted Flakes ads starring the 1950s Superman. :D
CRC QD Electronic Cleaner,
Ms. Liberty (holding up a can of CRC QD Electronic Cleaner): You know, I rely heavily on my electronics to work. So when I have a noisy pot or toggle, I reach for CRC QD Electronic Cleaner. Just spray away those dirty controls. Ask for it by name.
Elmer's Carpenter's Wood Glue,
Ms. Liberty (holding up a squeeze bottle of Elmer's Carpenter's Wood Glue): When I do wood joinery or repair, my wood glue of choice has been Elmer's Carpenter's Wood Glue. I use iall the time. Get yours today.
Tabasco Sauce,
Ms. Liberty (holding up a bottle of Tabasco Sauce): When I hit the sauce, I make it Tabasco Sauce. If it ain't hot enough for you, get something hotter, duh.
Ragu Pasta Sauce,
Ms. Liberty (holding up a jar of Ragu Pasta Sauce): Friends, when you need spaghetti and something like that, make it with Ragu brand sauces. Hey, you could do worse.
In light of this information https://www.gog.com/game/star_wars_battlefront_ii (https://www.gog.com/game/star_wars_battlefront_ii), I am gonna throw GoG into the mix. They would have the money (in theory), and they apparently have the know how, when it comes to resurrecting a slightly dated, but beloved game!
Arm & Hammer Baking Soda,
Ms. Liberty (holding up a box of Arm & Hammer Baking Soda): Friends, on a hot day nothing is more refreshing than an ice-cold soda. So when I get all hot and bothered, I drink Arm & Hammer Baking Soda
CUT
What was wrong with that one?
I see that Amazon is now in the game development arena "Amazon Game Studios". It looks like they are developing 3 games, one of which is an MMO called "New World". I don't know if anyone already brought it up, but Amazon would have the ability to rez City of Heroes.
https://games.amazon.com/
Arm & Hammer Baking Soda,
Ms. Liberty (holding up a box of Arm & Hammer Baking Soda): Friends, Arm & Hammer isn't a soda pop, it's for baking and 101 other uses around the house. Believe me we I say that my house stays well supplied.
PetsMart,
Masterminds and controllers love it.
Swingline Staplers,
When absolutely, possitily, most definely want to fasten two sheets of paper together. And imagine what we could do for City of Warcraft, or whatever the heck it was called.
Zantac, HE 235,
Yes, if you gotz heart burn and an acid stomache, poor dear. Take Zantac HE 235.
It knocks out acid fast, and we can do the same for City of Heroes.
Arachnos gives me heart burn.
Johnson & Johnson:
You cry babies want City of Heroes back? Well we have everything that babies need.
Gateway:
We would be mooooo, I mean more than happy to bring back City of Cows.
(what? Oh.)
Never-mind.
Global Life Insurance,
We would be honored to bring back City of Heroes, after you die.
Blizzard.
I think they would have smashed it.
Didn't Activision buy Candy Crush for $5 billion or something ridiculous?
CoH could have been bought with pocket change down the back of Blizzard's sofa.
A superhero game. It's the one hole in their game list.
Azrael.
Franzia boxed wines,
Here at Franzia, we put quality wine in boxes, no bottles, no corks.
City of Heroes would be a snap for us; is it a white or a red?
Charmin Bath Tissue
Please don't squeeze Ms. Liberty.
Goodyear Tire & Rubber Company,
Yeah, we'll bring back City of Heroes for you, complete with lots of rubber-banding.
AAA Auto Club,
We have helped millions of motorists out of difficult situations, you might say that we are their heroes.
So we would be more than happy to bring back City of Heroes and ...
Is that true?
Ladies and Gentlemen I have just been informed that the players of City of Heroes, so called, do NOT have vehicles.
The heroes relie on flying, jumping, running or teleporting to get around.
Well, we want no part of a world without cars, thank you.
Oral B,
Superheroes need to oral hygene while knocking the baddies teeth out.
So look for the name, look for the game!
Oral-B
Mandela
Then everyone will swear the game went offline only to find it's been live the entire time.
Major League Baseball -
Maybe then we can at least get to first-base trying to get City of Heroes back.
Meat Loaf.
The man knows about epic rock 'n' roll. He should know about about an epic video game.
North Korean -
Whatever South can do, we can do better.
(of course that means that after some many years, they too will shut it down.)
Quote from: Tubbius on May 23, 2018, 06:35:38 AM
Meat Loaf.
The man knows about epic rock 'n' roll. He should know about about an epic video game.
I remember some Saturday while playing COH, some toon pretending to be a doctor boardcast that "Video games are bad for one's health."
I responded by reminding everyone that this was a Massively Multi-player On-line Role Playing game, not a video game.
They all laughed
Santa Claus, Inc.
It would be the perfect gift.
Whatever company makes computer mice and keyboards;
They would make a fortune equipping us players. I know that I would wear out these items.
And a friend of mine used to show his frustration with the game by beating the snot out of his keyboard and/or mouse.
Quote from: Paragon Avenger on June 22, 2018, 01:59:31 AM
They would make a fortune equipping us players. I know that I would wear out these items.
And a friend of mine used to show his frustration with the game by beating the snot out of his keyboard and/or mouse.
I'm not hijacking this thread topic. What I've wanted for years in gaming equipment, keyboards, mice, game controllers..., made of Nerf-like/rubber? material so when you reach THAT-POINT! you can throw it at the wall, out the window, use a hammer, fists, your buddy, etc... as hard as you can and no damage to anything.
OK resume topic :D
Foxcomm,
According to the news they are building a manufacturing plant in the U.S.A., so why not buy NCSoft while you're at it.
Dave Ramsey,
He could buy the game and tweak it a little here and there. For Example, the new name would be:
Dave Ramsey's City of Debt-Free Heroes, and Dave Ramsey's City of Evil Credit Card Villains.
Dave Ramsey buys CoX ...
The Lost would be renamed the 'Normal People'.
Heroic Bank Missions will be to shut-down the lending department.
The way to win the game is to be high-level with tons of influence.
E3 Spark Plugs, "Born to Burn";
Yes, we will purchase City of Heroes, but with the following changes:
The only travel power, super speed.
All powers will be fire based.
There will be special NASCAR weekend events.
Hi I'm Elon Musk
I'm shooting cars into space, outfitting people with flame-throwers, planning for Mars bases and researching direct neural interfaces to computers.
If this doesn't scream major super-villain I don't know what does.
Will a personal cheque do?
Avon buys CoH,
The following changes have been made:
- There are a whole bunch more makeup options instead of makeup1 and makeup2.
- Part of every mission involves door-to-door sales
- When you level, you throw a party, yes an avon party
- All the heroes and villains smell good
- All the contacts try to sell you product
The DMV has purchased City of Heroes in an attempt to boost revenues.
The following changes have been made:
- There is a waiting line to get missions
- Street sweeoing requires a tough to get license, like a CDL, only endorsement: DA for Defeat All
- There is a charge of $10 for leveling
- You must bring 3 pieces of approved photo ID to run your character
- Badge hunting must be scheduled 24 hours in advance and the proper forms filed
- Farming is a different department
- Power-leveling is strictly forbidden, and can result in fines, prison or both
- No more holiday events, instead the game will be closed for holidays
- Teams must be approved, and nobody can quit the team without prior authorization
- Using Cash to pay incurrs an additional fee
- Using a personal check incurrs an additional fee
- They are not setup for credit or debit cards
Champions Online,
We can do wonders for City of Heroes. Like ...
Street instances that quickly reset for the next player.
Comic book looking graphics.
PvP made easy.
Teaming made difficult.
Taskforces? What's that?
Alerts, alerts, alerts.
A confusing money system.
molotov cocktails,
We can really heat-up Paragon City.
Long John Silver's Sea Food.
We sell the best chicken in the business. Betcha didn't know that chicken was sea food. Anywho, we can do the same for City of Pirates, or heroes, or whatever it was.
Meade,
Since nobody uses paper any more, we should do on-line MMORPG role playing games. How hard could it be?
Parker Brothers,
We've been making games since...before you were born. We can certainly handle a simple MMORPG like City of Heroes. Oh yeah, we're Hasbro now, never mind.
Chef Boyardee,
Yes, we can cook up City of Heroes. We've been making meals easy for decades, now we can make games easy too.
Only Hami will have to be replaced by huge meatball.
Bosch,
No the one way Lomb is Bosh.
Anyway, we make great consumer electronics. So why not great electronic games for consumers?
We will be launching City of Heroes by Bosch(c) in the near future.
Superman,
I can do almost anything, so bringing back an MMORPG piece of cake.
What? NC who?
Oh nevermind, I'm not getting mixed up with those creeps.
Quote from: Ryo Kinsaru on November 21, 2014, 01:40:00 AM
Chef Gordon Ramsay:
"Where the f&%k is the f&%king game? Why the f&%k isn't the f&%king game up and f&%king running yet? Just buy the f&%king game and put it the f&%k online! The f&%king customers are f&%king waiting!"
Love it all over again.
Barbie,
Sure, I'll bring back City of Heroes. I'll just hop into a my pink Volkswagon with blue flowers. I'll pick-up Skipper and we can have this done in no time. After we change clothes, of course.
Sears,
They could...nevermind.
Bounce,
Because the game is going to bounce back!!!!
Titan.
z.z
Cravendale.
>_> youtube it (https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=qbmon-l74V0).
Wreck It Ralph says, "I'm going to wreck it."
And he can do the same for City of Heroes.
ftw: DISCORD
Quote from: Paragon Avenger on August 26, 2016, 02:12:17 AM
Kay Jewelers,
Every Knockback, knockdown or kill begins with K.
Come on people, that IS a good one.
Quote from: Paragon Avenger on August 17, 2019, 04:53:12 AM
Come on people, that IS a good one.
No one dies, they get transported to the hospital...
But.... every knockback, knockdown and knockOUT begins with K.
( ' :
kill = defeat, but defeat don't start with 'k', and if I said that every knockdown, knockback and kefeat begins with 'K', they would have kicked me off the forum.