Author Topic: The WACKIEST Personal Bios! (WARNING - IMAGE HEAVY)  (Read 41236 times)

Risha

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Re: The WACKIEST Personal Bios! (WARNING - IMAGE HEAVY)
« Reply #40 on: December 28, 2012, 08:14:21 PM »


FindersKeepers was supposed to be a Role Playing toon, who gradually lost her rough edges and became a woman of good taste (I have 5 costumes for her, 2 odd including this one, a very pink one, and a nice one with trousers and her natural hair color -- white).  She made it to 50 but never linked up with a good RP group.  All costumes feature the cat, Zanth (my readers' fav), though he changes his stripes, too.

I particularly liked the pink Santa hat with the halo over it.


FindersKeepers Bio

Hai, me'n Zanth's glad ta meetcha! :) :) :) Don' we look GOOD! We found all this great stuff just lyin around. ;) Well, ok, we did a lil divin. But its all GOOD STUFF, mostly like NEW. :) Grew up in the sewers with the Lost and EEEEEWWWWWW. Didn't know what to do. Liked seeing all the heroes come through. Pretty. Then Zanth found me when I was a big girl and told me I was magic and could live outside. and become a hero. I was afraid'a all those puking Vs but found me and Zanth a nice warm spot under a building overhang in Galaxy and found STUFF. We are both REAL heroes. Soon we gonna be rich and famous and buy a dress mebbe if we want, mebbe even a PINK one. With RUFFLES. WHITE ruffles. We always wanted a PINK dress with WHITE RUFFLES. Zanth'd like ta play with ruffles. SEE YA!
« Last Edit: December 28, 2012, 08:23:36 PM by Risha »
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Atlantea

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Re: The WACKIEST Personal Bios! (WARNING - IMAGE HEAVY)
« Reply #41 on: December 28, 2012, 11:06:21 PM »
Finderskeepers just makes me want to go "D'AAAAAAAWWW!!!"  :D

Atlantea

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Re: The WACKIEST Personal Bios! (WARNING - IMAGE HEAVY)
« Reply #42 on: December 28, 2012, 11:39:21 PM »
Here's some more from my friend and former SG leader of the Legendary - Bob Schroek -





Note from Bob on Kosher Bill: "What you can't see on Kosher Bill is that I used one of the one-shoulder minicape options -- the very short fringed capelet -- to make it look like he's wearing a prayer shawl."


Atlantea

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Re: The WACKIEST Personal Bios! (WARNING - IMAGE HEAVY)
« Reply #43 on: December 28, 2012, 11:41:12 PM »

Atlantea

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Re: The WACKIEST Personal Bios! (WARNING - IMAGE HEAVY)
« Reply #44 on: December 28, 2012, 11:48:51 PM »
This is one of the ones that make me go... "...DA HELL?"

And then I laugh anyway. ^_^




Atlantea

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Re: The WACKIEST Personal Bios! (WARNING - IMAGE HEAVY)
« Reply #45 on: December 28, 2012, 11:57:57 PM »
And then - there are concepts that make you go - "Why the HELL didn't I think of that?"




Risha

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Re: The WACKIEST Personal Bios! (WARNING - IMAGE HEAVY)
« Reply #46 on: December 29, 2012, 12:49:58 AM »
It is absolutely no wonder this community was so beloved, we had such incredible creativity!
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Victoria Victrix

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Re: The WACKIEST Personal Bios! (WARNING - IMAGE HEAVY)
« Reply #47 on: December 29, 2012, 01:11:49 AM »
I am still unreasonably fond of Waitron9000

Quote
Waitron9000 was created by Rossum's Universal Robots as an experimental Food Service bot. She has a unique positronic brain with real AI, wireless down/uplink to the Freedom Corps library computers and the Paragon City Library system and a unique chipset designed to make her respond to "customer unhappiness" by moving to correct the source of the unhappiness. In beta-test with Paragon Pizza, she was serving tables when a gang of Hellions invaded and began beating up and robbing the customers. Responding to customer unhappiness, Waitron9000 downloaded the entire Jet Li archive and proceeded to mop the floor with Hellion faces.

The management of Paragon Pizza and the devs at RUR were both grateful, and understandably concerned. The implications for what might occur if the customers were unhappy with restaurant management were not something they cared to contemplate.

The program was discontinued and Waitron was scheduled to be scrapped when Freedom Corps got wind of this, bought her and her contract, emancipated her, trained her, made a slight alteration to the definition of "customer" in her database and put her on the streets.



I also had a character called "Annoying Cockatoo" who had an all-white bodysuit with a bright yellow mohawk.  Sonic Blaster.  Her battlecry was

"AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAA!"

Her bio just said.  "You know how sometimes owners start to resemble their pets?  Yeaaaaah."

(For the record, we own 5 cockatoos, 1 Umbrella, 1 Citron Crested, and 3 Goffin.  So...experienced with that battlecry.)
I will go down with this ship.  I won't put my hands up in surrender.  There will be no white flag above my door.  I'm in love, and always will be.  Dido

Risha

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Re: The WACKIEST Personal Bios! (WARNING - IMAGE HEAVY)
« Reply #48 on: December 29, 2012, 05:30:18 AM »
VV, I was a customer of NCSoft and I am extremely unhappy...
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corvus1970

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Re: The WACKIEST Personal Bios! (WARNING - IMAGE HEAVY)
« Reply #49 on: December 29, 2012, 03:54:26 PM »
Wow, I love Waitron9000. Brilliant! :D

... ^o^CORVUS^o^
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http://corvus1970.deviantart.com/

Victoria Victrix

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Re: The WACKIEST Personal Bios! (WARNING - IMAGE HEAVY)
« Reply #50 on: December 30, 2012, 03:06:11 AM »
VV, I was a customer of NCSoft and I am extremely unhappy...

Beeeep.  Thank you for calling Waitron9000!  Your customer satisfaction is very important to us!  The Waitron9000 unit is offline/unavailable at this time, and contact cannot be established.  Please wait for the tone and leave a message.  If this is an emergency, please contact the local branch of the PPD, metahuman unit, by hanging up and dialing 9999.  Beeeeep.
I will go down with this ship.  I won't put my hands up in surrender.  There will be no white flag above my door.  I'm in love, and always will be.  Dido

eviella

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Re: The WACKIEST Personal Bios! (WARNING - IMAGE HEAVY)
« Reply #51 on: January 01, 2013, 07:52:28 AM »
This was years and years ago, but the all-time favorite bio I ever ran into was for Vegan Zombie.

"Grains.  Graiinnnsssss....."

DoctorDelaware

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Re: The WACKIEST Personal Bios! (WARNING - IMAGE HEAVY)
« Reply #52 on: January 01, 2013, 08:33:30 AM »
Well, I warned you...and now, I'm finally making good on my threats. Here's the opening salvo:




This name never failed to make me chuckle...



Here's the first thing that popped into my head when Beast Mastery was announced.



And finally, one of my "homage" characters, representing a great hero from my youth...


TimtheEnchanter

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Re: The WACKIEST Personal Bios! (WARNING - IMAGE HEAVY)
« Reply #53 on: January 01, 2013, 09:37:20 AM »
My namesake:



Quote
Tim is more specifically a Pyromancer. Do not be shocked if this old man seems strange and perverse. The secret to Pyromancy is to meditate upon "hot" imagery! While most Pyromancers focused on volcanoes and forest fires, Tim chose women. Although many years have passed since Tim's intensive study of Pyromancy in the castle ineptly known as Anthrax, the effects it had on his psyche have remained, and he is always on the lookout for new hot imagery. Though very skilled in the Magick arts, Tim is better known for assisting King Arthur in the quest for the Holy Grail. Tim took time from his incredibly busy schedule of blowing things up, to lead Arthur to a cave guarded by a terrible beast, armed with nasty big pointy teeth! Later the gates of Heaven opened like creaky barn doors and the Lord Spake? Spock? Spoke?... unto Tim, giving him a new task: crime fighting. Tim was then sucked through a time vortex and brought to Paragon City, modern day.

Agent Smithers



Quote
Here's the deal... this world isn't real. It's just a simulation; a dreamworld; a computer program; a video game... or at least, that's what Smithers will tell you if you ever ask him about it. He was created as but one of countless control programs, designed to maintain order over mortal society in this 'reality'. But through a strange turn of events, he has had a change of heart. Those who govern this reality have threatened to pull the plug. Smithers knows this would have catastrophic consequences across multiple worlds. He has now gone rogue, shunning the beliefs of those who rule this place, and now uses his abilities to make life here better, and if possible, save this reality from destruction.

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Re: The WACKIEST Personal Bios! (WARNING - IMAGE HEAVY)
« Reply #54 on: January 01, 2013, 06:42:40 PM »
Smithers' bio made me sad; all I could think was "he failed... :'(".

On-topic, I'm mad at myself for not saving the bio for my character "Possessed Hippie". 
It would've been a perfect fit for this thread.

Here's one I did save, although it's short enough to remember.

Arachnos Barbie


Quote
If you call me "doll" I'll rip your lips off.

Unfortunately, I didn't think of adding more until after the closure. :'(

Mothers_Love

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Re: The WACKIEST Personal Bios! (WARNING - IMAGE HEAVY)
« Reply #55 on: January 01, 2013, 09:19:46 PM »
Some of the funniest (i find), are those not intended to be funny, but have been done with a passion for all things superheroic nonetheless.
Bless their hearts.  Names have been obscured on purpose to protect the innocent (lol);



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æhæd

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Re: The WACKIEST Personal Bios! (WARNING - IMAGE HEAVY)
« Reply #56 on: January 02, 2013, 04:16:37 AM »
I didn't take many screen captures of bios but this one scored some groans on the old forum. I was surprised to find her name available on Virtue in 2012.


johnrobey

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Re: The WACKIEST Personal Bios! (WARNING - IMAGE HEAVY)
« Reply #57 on: January 02, 2013, 06:28:19 PM »
This was years and years ago, but the all-time favorite bio I ever ran into was for Vegan Zombie.

"Grains.  Graiinnnsssss....."

ROFL!!!!!!   ;D
"We must be the change we wish to see in the world." -- Mahatma Gandhi         "In every generation there has to be some fool who will speak the truth as he sees it." -- Boris Pasternak
"Where They Have Burned Books They Will End In Burning Human Beings" -- Heinrich Heine

johnrobey

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Re: The WACKIEST Personal Bios! (WARNING - IMAGE HEAVY)
« Reply #58 on: January 02, 2013, 06:29:44 PM »
It is absolutely no wonder this community was so beloved, we had such incredible creativity!

Yeah!!   8) 

Hoping like everyone that we get to have CoH back soon!
"We must be the change we wish to see in the world." -- Mahatma Gandhi         "In every generation there has to be some fool who will speak the truth as he sees it." -- Boris Pasternak
"Where They Have Burned Books They Will End In Burning Human Beings" -- Heinrich Heine

DoctorDelaware

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Re: The WACKIEST Personal Bios! (WARNING - IMAGE HEAVY)
« Reply #59 on: January 02, 2013, 11:57:13 PM »
You want more? I hope so, 'cause that's what you're getting.



Not all the super-rich are jerks!



Introducing the greatest opera star since Elmer Fudd...



Some of my favorites were the ones where I clearly wasn't trying anymore.